Summary:
- The virtues of feedback – such as improved decision making, work quality, accountability, and continuous improvement – are widely and frequently discussed. However, poorly delivered feedback can backfire, potentially causing lasting and significant damage.
- Becoming familiar with 6 common mistakes in giving feedback – and the external and internal conditions which precede them – can help you anticipate and avoid acting on unproductive impulses or intuitions about how and when to give feedback.
Feedback is a cornerstone of effective leadership; it has the potential to improve decision-making, enhance work quality, and foster an environment of continuous improvement. However, feedback, when poorly delivered, can have the exact opposite effect, potentially causing significant and often lasting damage. In this article we’ll share 6 common mistakes that cause feedback to backfire, and why we are tempted to make these mistakes so that you may more easily recognize and avoid them in the future.
Six Ways Feedback Can Backfire
- Tunnel Vision: When feedback is narrowly focused on just one or two details – such as a specific opportunity for improvement – we can lose the forest for the trees. Feedback has the opportunity to recognize so much more than opportunities for improvement; consider, what has been done well? How has the work itself made the requirements of the project more clear? What quality of thinking has gone into the work that would be worth carrying forward?
Sometimes risks may be taken which didn’t pay off this time, but some degree of risk taking or experimentation would be valuable to carry forward in future work. Focusing exclusively on opportunities for improvement can demoralize and disengage individuals, and risks overlooking the individual’s strengths, minimizing motivation, and reducing the aperture of possibility in future work.
Tunnel vision is a common mistake due to some common temptations:
- A desire to keep the feedback conversation efficient
- A desire to be direct and specific
While efficiency, specificity, and direct communication are all valuable, don’t let these desires derail your feedback conversation by tunneling in too closely on one or two opportunities for improvement.
- Too Vague: On the other extreme of the spectrum from tunnel vision is feedback that is too general or vague. When feedback fails to clarify what specifically worked well, what needs improvement, or why, it leaves team members unsure about how to improve and what to do more of. This can plateau their professional growth by discouraging or misdirecting future effort, and can send the message that their work isn’t actually significant enough to warrant much attention.
Leaders may be tempted to resort to vague feedback for a few reasons:
- They feel uncomfortable delivering critical comments
- They are distracted with other priorities
- They are unclear on the means to evaluate the work
- Too Soon: Providing feedback too soon, particularly if it’s critical, may convey impatience and a lack of trust in the individual’s ability to self-assess and self-correct. It can dilute their self-confidence and send the message that their intelligence is deemed to be insufficient to the task at hand.
It’s tempting for many leaders to offer immediate feedback when:
- They feel pressure to get great results the first time or there is little room for error
- They think they can ‘fix’ an issue on the spot or prevent mistakes
- They can save somebody the bother
To err is human. Ideally, our work environments admit the possibility of human error, but when stakes are high, consider sharing responsibility – rather than delegating it – to also share the responsibility for any risk of failure. This ensures future engagement from your team and prevents situations where capable individuals are reluctant to step up to the plate.
- Too Late: Delayed feedback can be as harmful as premature feedback. If feedback comes too late, it loses its context and relevance. Both parties – the one giving feedback and the one receiving – may not remember the contributor’s actions as clearly, and it can feel more like an afterthought.
The most common cause for delayed feedback is competing priorities, though a desire to avoid conflict may also play a part. To avoid forsaking the important for the urgent, consider scheduling feedback on your calendar as even a short meeting, or scheduling in extra time for the agenda of another meeting already on the calendar. Your doing so sends the message that the person receiving feedback – and their work – is valuable and worthy of your attention.
- Overly Critical: Harshly critical feedback can undermine an individual’s performance and self-esteem. While a single instance of harshly critical feedback can be enough to deter an individual from taking on future discretionary responsibility, two instances of harshly critical feedback may be enough to create a perception of a “toxic culture” where the fear of criticism discourages the application of the intelligence of many – not just the individual(s) who received the harsh criticism in the first place.
Harshly critical feedback is not reserved for rude or callus leaders. Many generally kind and skilled leaders face temptations to provide harshly critical feedback, such as when:
- Individuals don’t share the same expectations for, or investment in, work quality
- Stakes are high and there is little room for failure
- Time, money, or other resources for a project limit the quality of output
- Sugar Coated: In contrast to overly critical feedback, sugar coated feedback prioritizes the recipient’s “feeling good” in the short term above long term outcomes like individual and organizational learning.
Similar to feedback that is too vague, sugar coated feedback can be tempting when:
- A new or inexperienced leader has yet to build trust and rapport with their team, and doesn’t want to risk getting off on a bad foot
- A leader anticipates a near-term need to “extract” the best performance of the recipient (and therefore not have them distracted by processing difficult feedback)
- Office politics and/or gossip networks may be used against the leader delivering the feedback
In conclusion, while feedback remains one of the most powerful tools leaders have to drive growth, accountability, and continuous improvement, its delivery must be thoughtful, intentional, and rooted in a genuine desire to support the other person’s growth and success. By avoiding common pitfalls, leaders can prevent feedback from backfiring and leading to frustrated or unmotivated team members. When feedback is given with the intent to uplift and support, it enhances performance, nurtures confidence, and fosters a culture of open, honest communication. Thoughtfully delivered feedback not only strengthens individuals but also builds a more resilient, adaptive organization where people feel empowered to learn and grow.